13 April, 2007

Cubitus Interruptus

Pity poor Cubitus interruptus. If you are here, and reading something such as these words, then you can identify with poor, scrawny Cubitus. Every day Cubitus was held down by the other big kids, like Fused, and backed up against a microtubule as he was beaten again and again, degraded time after time. All that Cubitus ever wanted to do was run away to the nucleus to play with his imaginary friend, CSL, but alas, Fused kept him away every time.

The all-seeing Patched saw all that happened to poor Cubitus, every time, and did nothing. Patched only sat there imperiously, watching with a cold hard and an even colder grip on Smoothened's shoulder. You see, Smoothened had a kind heart, and would gladly have gone to help poor Cubitus by disrupting the bullying actions of Fused, but Patched restrained her.

Then one day Hedgehog came along. Hedgehog snuck up alongside Patched and all of a sudden sank his spines into Patched.

No one knows why Hedgehog did it.

Nonetheless, it gave Smoothened that one opportunity she needed, and she darted away and shoved Fused off of little Cubitus. Cubitus, finally free of Fused's blows, immediately darted away to the nucleus to frolic with his imaginary friend and was happy ever after.

Moral: Smoothened is nicer than you think. Patched is a bitch.

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