Leave the calipers at home. Although it may seem that measuring the ratio of her shoulders to her brain pan volume is an easier and more direct way of assessing her intelligence, it actually turns out that most women prefer you speak with them and use conversation as a gauge. Needless to say, this is messy, but it is not only expected, it's required. It should also be noted that normalizing the least squares average of you and hers' combined brain pan volumes to the width of her hips as an approximate function of successful procreation is a very large and inexcusable mistake.
No doubt you've noticed it's done and the poll is now closed. I have to say that I'm somewhat intrigued by the results. I had not anticipated that Stilton would be so popular; it almost beat Gouda. Honestly, I expected Gouda to win, and it did, because everyone seems to think it's a fancy, lovely cheese.
Now, perhaps you're wondering: what cheese would Toaster be? Well, I think I would be one of the least popular cheeses in the poll, the Double Gloucester.
Also, I had thought that the possible list of cheeses was rather comprehensive, so for those of you who marked others: what did you have in mind?
Toaster is going on vacation in a place that does not guarantee Internet access, and as such does not guarantee your regularly scheduled blogging. I will, however, still be active on Twitter (@ToasterSunshine). Nonetheless, I have prepared a couple of posts that are scheduled to publish while I am away to tide you over.
Take care of the Internet in my absence. I'm going to be mightily pissed if I come back and find it overrun by LOLcats.